For Christmas, we headed back to teh Minnesota thanks to the generous gift of plane tickets from Kevin's parents! Getting there was a bit of an ordeal, we planned to leave our apartment at 930p for our flight that left at 1250a. The drive to SeaTac is about 45 minutes or so, giving us plenty of time.
Unfortunately, we didn't actually leave at 930p... Kevin decided it would be a good idea to park his car in a snowbank. I spent 30 minutes pushing and placing cardboard under his wheels to get him out. If you ask him, he'd say 15 minutes, but he was in the car all warm and cozy pressing the gas pedal and turning the wheel (what man lets his girlfriend push the car out of the snow??!) The actual time was probably somewhere in between... 22.5 minutes or so. I can maybe cut him some slack about parking in a snowbank considering this is his first winter without his jeep and the four-wheel drive that goes along with it.
Anyway, 952p and we finally get on the road. The drive took slightly longer than anticipated, but they always do here where the traffic never moves (or so it seems). Probably get to the SeaTac area around 1055p. Wanted to use offsite parking, but all the lots were snowed in--of course! Ended up having to park at the airport, but for some reason there was a HUGE back up getting in.
I don't know if drivers do this everywhere or not, but it seems to be a big problem in Seattle. You'll have jerks pulling onto the "exit only" or "this lane must exit" areas because they are not backed up and then try to get back over right before the lane ends. It is annoying and slows everyone down because no one wants to let those people back in.
Anyway, we finally get parked at 1130p. Luckily security and check-in were pretty dead and we got to our gate right when they started boarding first class. Phew. Yes, we have had much worse plane experiences (ask us about our Bill Clinton/Snowstorm Madison Departure and our Chicago/Stormy/Next Day Vegas Departure), but it is never fun to have the unexpected occur. Anyway, we made it to Minneapolis in one piece.
We sat in the airport for while watching CNN. Clearly, it was a slow news day because they reported on a water main that broke for 1.5 hrs (and probably more, but we were saved by Brent). We went to the magnet store and lego land where Kevin and Brent built toy cars... then Becky and Eric arrived and we had a nice little lunch. Thanks to you all for the lovely gifts! Hopefully you enjoyed yours as well.
Then it was off with my mom to Mankato. Nothing eventful really happens. We made a vegetarian Christmas feast which was fun, considering my mom and brother would prefer turkey or ham or something of the sort.
We had Christmas at my maternal grandparents on the Eve and at my paternal grandparents on the 26th. We do a gift exchange where everyone puts something in the middle (boys buy for boys etc.) and then we draw numbers. Lowest number has to go first and opens a present from the middle... next person can either take the present from the first person or open a different gift and so on.
Well, last year Kevin ended up with a toolbox. I warned him not to pick a gift that was for a man (pick unisex instead), but he went against my advice. The men in my family are all very manly men--they like to hunt, fish, fix stuff, play with tools, etc... Kevin doesn't fit into that at all. Well, he did it again this year--ended up with a fluorescent shop light... Lucky for him, my mom took pity on him and stole it, giving him a chance to get something a little less... masculine.
It was a very short trip, but we had birdies, kitties, and fishes missing us at home. It is good to be back and now the weather is more tolerable (no snow on the ground and 40 degrees).
Thanks again to everyone for shlepping us around and for the gifts you gave! We really appreciate it!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
"record snow"
As some of you know, the northwest has been experiencing "record snowfall" and the "worst winter in 20 years." Figures... once I move, they have a bad winter. Weather hates me and follows me around. On the bright side, if I stayed in Madison, I wouldn't be getting anything better. We thought Madison's 100+ inches last year was bad enough, but their snowfall this year is about 10 inches ahead of the pace set last year!
Record snow for Seattle is only a measly six inches. Psh. That's nothing! Worst winter in 20 years is only 20-30 degrees! Psh. That's nothing!
Everytime we check out somewhere, the checker always says something like "man, can you believe that weather out there? it's so cold!" To which we scoff and say "We are from Minnesota, you don't know cold. This is an unseasonably nice winter day there." This is said, of course, by Kevin who is still wearing a t-shirt and nothing more.
You really would think this weather is nothing given where Kevin and I have lived for the majority of our lives, but they make six inches of snow seem like 16 inches of snow. They don't plow--except for I5. They just leave everything. It wouldn't be bad if they knew how to deal with it, but the Seattle method of dealing with winter is to shut all business down.
Also, the hills are awful. They don't plow those either... downtown is a deathtrap. Perhaps you saw the two charter buses leaning over the guardrail over looking I5 on the news, very very scary!
When you aren't used to having your entire city going into a lockdown over a little snow, it is a bit annoying. No doubt it is less annoying than coping with 6 months of -20 degree weather and 100+ inches of snow, but still not the paradise I imagined.
Record snow for Seattle is only a measly six inches. Psh. That's nothing! Worst winter in 20 years is only 20-30 degrees! Psh. That's nothing!
Everytime we check out somewhere, the checker always says something like "man, can you believe that weather out there? it's so cold!" To which we scoff and say "We are from Minnesota, you don't know cold. This is an unseasonably nice winter day there." This is said, of course, by Kevin who is still wearing a t-shirt and nothing more.
You really would think this weather is nothing given where Kevin and I have lived for the majority of our lives, but they make six inches of snow seem like 16 inches of snow. They don't plow--except for I5. They just leave everything. It wouldn't be bad if they knew how to deal with it, but the Seattle method of dealing with winter is to shut all business down.
Also, the hills are awful. They don't plow those either... downtown is a deathtrap. Perhaps you saw the two charter buses leaning over the guardrail over looking I5 on the news, very very scary!
When you aren't used to having your entire city going into a lockdown over a little snow, it is a bit annoying. No doubt it is less annoying than coping with 6 months of -20 degree weather and 100+ inches of snow, but still not the paradise I imagined.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
uncommon cat toys
I think anyone who owns a cat knows that they enjoy playing with the things they perceive as being "not toys." You can buy the fanciest, fuzzy, crinkly, pink toy mouse out there, but when given the choice between pink mouse and a milk seal, the seal always wins.
I'm providing a list of uncommon (and cheap) cat toys -
1. Milk/Juice Seal - You know the little piece of plastic you have to peal off before you can unscrew the top... cats love it.
2. Pipe Cleaners - Just make sure you fold the ends down, so they aren't so pokey.
3. Cardboard Boxes - Our cats are interior designers and architects. They enjoy large boxes that they can chew skylights and trap doors into. We have an aquarium box that never fails to entertain and leave tiny bits of cardboard all over our carpet.
4. Dice - This may not be the best for most cats, but ones who like a challenge won't be able to resist the bouncy, clink dice make when dropped into a bathtub or tile floor. Rio likes to carry them around in her mouth and throw them to herself.
5. Drum Sticks - Our cats think these are evil and drag them around the house to show them who's the boss (and it isn't Tony Danza)!
6. Feathers - I bought a pack of craft store feathers for my owl costume, and it was all I could do to keep the cats from wandering away with them all.
7. Dinosaurs - Toy ones of course. I found one in their water dish this morning--he met a watery death. Muwah-wah-wahhhh.
8. Straws - Sprocket stole one out of the garbage, and he loves it. He'll carry it around and attack it for hours. But, he also likes to sleep on Stephen King books "Insomnia" and "Needful Things" so he is a little odd to start with.
9. Kleenex/Toliet Paper/Paper Towel - Give them the empty roll or a sheet... but it gets pretty messy.
They love any of these items more than anything we've ever bought for them. Jerks.
I'm providing a list of uncommon (and cheap) cat toys -
1. Milk/Juice Seal - You know the little piece of plastic you have to peal off before you can unscrew the top... cats love it.
2. Pipe Cleaners - Just make sure you fold the ends down, so they aren't so pokey.
3. Cardboard Boxes - Our cats are interior designers and architects. They enjoy large boxes that they can chew skylights and trap doors into. We have an aquarium box that never fails to entertain and leave tiny bits of cardboard all over our carpet.
4. Dice - This may not be the best for most cats, but ones who like a challenge won't be able to resist the bouncy, clink dice make when dropped into a bathtub or tile floor. Rio likes to carry them around in her mouth and throw them to herself.
5. Drum Sticks - Our cats think these are evil and drag them around the house to show them who's the boss (and it isn't Tony Danza)!
6. Feathers - I bought a pack of craft store feathers for my owl costume, and it was all I could do to keep the cats from wandering away with them all.
7. Dinosaurs - Toy ones of course. I found one in their water dish this morning--he met a watery death. Muwah-wah-wahhhh.
8. Straws - Sprocket stole one out of the garbage, and he loves it. He'll carry it around and attack it for hours. But, he also likes to sleep on Stephen King books "Insomnia" and "Needful Things" so he is a little odd to start with.
9. Kleenex/Toliet Paper/Paper Towel - Give them the empty roll or a sheet... but it gets pretty messy.
They love any of these items more than anything we've ever bought for them. Jerks.
Friday, December 12, 2008
ratatouille
Since I've decided to go the way of the vegetarian, I've been cooking more and more. I've also been attempting to train Kevin how to cook (he didn't even know how to brown hamburger... he asks me if it is done, I ask if it is brown, he says yes, then I say... well if you are browning the hamburger and it is now brown, then I think you are done).
Last night we made Ratatouille, and while it was not nearly adorable as a rat making the dish, I think it was still good. You MUST like vegetables a lot and have high quality produce to make this worth the effort since it really just emphasizes the best qualities of the vegetables. We modeled our version on a recipe from allrecipes.com.
Makes 4 very large servings or 8 small servings. You can serve with noodles or rice, but we just ate ours plain.
Heat 1 T oil, and saute garlic, onion, and eggplant on medium heat until eggplant is softened.
Layer vegetables in casserole dish coated with 1 T. olive oil: eggplant/onion/garlic mixture, sprinkle of parm, zucchini/squash, sprinkle of parm, mushrooms/bell pepper, sprinkle of parm, and tomatoes on top with the rest of the parm.
Note: You can add some salt to the dish, we just did a small sprinkle on top because I don't like adding a lot of sodium. I figure individuals can salt their own if they want more.
Cook for 45 minutes in a 350 degree oven.
Last night we made Ratatouille, and while it was not nearly adorable as a rat making the dish, I think it was still good. You MUST like vegetables a lot and have high quality produce to make this worth the effort since it really just emphasizes the best qualities of the vegetables. We modeled our version on a recipe from allrecipes.com.
Makes 4 very large servings or 8 small servings. You can serve with noodles or rice, but we just ate ours plain.
- 2 tablespoons olive oil
- 3 cloves garlic, minced
- 2 teaspoons dried parsley
- 1 eggplant, peeled and cut into 1/2 inch cubes
- 3/4 cup shredded Parmesan cheese
- 1 zucchini, sliced
- 1 summer squash, sliced
- 1 large onion, sliced into rings
- 1/2 cup sliced fresh mushrooms
- 1 green bell pepper, sliced
- 2 large tomatoes, sliced
Layer vegetables in casserole dish coated with 1 T. olive oil: eggplant/onion/garlic mixture, sprinkle of parm, zucchini/squash, sprinkle of parm, mushrooms/bell pepper, sprinkle of parm, and tomatoes on top with the rest of the parm.
Note: You can add some salt to the dish, we just did a small sprinkle on top because I don't like adding a lot of sodium. I figure individuals can salt their own if they want more.
Cook for 45 minutes in a 350 degree oven.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
the longest game ever
Since I am poor due to lack of employment (still working on that), I made Kevin a game for our three year anniversary. He is sentimental and likes to celebrate these occasions; I could take them or leave them. It was a very long and drawn out endeavor, but hey, I have the time. The whole thing probably cost $15.
Here is the tale of our first experience playing "The Longest Game Ever." Turns out, the game was aptly titled. We began play at 7:15 pm, and I won the game at 12:45 am. The object of the game is to be the last person to lose all their point tokens. It really can go as long or as short as you want it to depending on the number of tokens you start with. You lose tokens by failing to complete tasks, losing a game, bad luck, and refusing to answer questions.
The game board consists of blank, secret, chance, and activities spaces. Landing on a secret space requires the player to draw a card and answer the question written on the card in a timely and satisfactory way--they lose token if they don't answer or beat around the bush. A chance card is random luck--like a roll of the dice or flip of a coin. An activities card involves playing a small game, and the loser of the game also loses a token.
There are also 4 larger challenge spaces--quickfire, jeopardy, gamer, and crossword. In a quickfire challenge, each player chooses an ingredient for a total of 5, then they must create a dish using all those ingredients within the time limit determined by the roll of a dice. Person with the worst dish loses a point. In a gamer challenge, 4 video games are chosen, the first to 3 wins gets to keep their point. In the jeopardy challenge, we watch a tivo'ed episode of the show and keep score. Lastly, a crossword challenge involves us doing a crossword puzzle--first to complete the puzzle, or whoever completes the most, wins.
With that explanation in mind, here are the highlights:
1. Kevin drew an activities card which required us each to 'interpretive dance' to a song of the other persons choosing. Worst dance lost. Well, he had to dance to 'To the Dogs or Whoever' by Josh Ritter, and boy was it AWFUL. It mostly consisted of skipping and hiking up his boxers when the song go to the line 'did I mention how I love you in your underwear?'
2. Quickfire challenges were awesome. The first one had syrup, vanilla ice cream, chocolate chips, cinnamon wheat thins, and caramel sauce with a 4 minute time limit. I made a take on fried ice cream while Kevin made smiley face with ice cream sandwich eyes and a syrup mouth--and he won! The second challenge had spinach, salsa verde, garlic powder, mrs. dash, and limeade with a 5 minute time limit. I made a breakfast burrito with scrambled eggs and a sour cream/limeade/salsa verde sauce. Kevin made "HOT Cows in a Blanket"-- cottage cheese rolled up in spinach with salsa and a limeade vodka shot. Except he nuked cottage cheese for 20 seconds. Apparently it never occurred to him that it would melt.... here is what was left:
Needless to say, I won that round. And the game.
Here is the tale of our first experience playing "The Longest Game Ever." Turns out, the game was aptly titled. We began play at 7:15 pm, and I won the game at 12:45 am. The object of the game is to be the last person to lose all their point tokens. It really can go as long or as short as you want it to depending on the number of tokens you start with. You lose tokens by failing to complete tasks, losing a game, bad luck, and refusing to answer questions.
The game board consists of blank, secret, chance, and activities spaces. Landing on a secret space requires the player to draw a card and answer the question written on the card in a timely and satisfactory way--they lose token if they don't answer or beat around the bush. A chance card is random luck--like a roll of the dice or flip of a coin. An activities card involves playing a small game, and the loser of the game also loses a token.
There are also 4 larger challenge spaces--quickfire, jeopardy, gamer, and crossword. In a quickfire challenge, each player chooses an ingredient for a total of 5, then they must create a dish using all those ingredients within the time limit determined by the roll of a dice. Person with the worst dish loses a point. In a gamer challenge, 4 video games are chosen, the first to 3 wins gets to keep their point. In the jeopardy challenge, we watch a tivo'ed episode of the show and keep score. Lastly, a crossword challenge involves us doing a crossword puzzle--first to complete the puzzle, or whoever completes the most, wins.
With that explanation in mind, here are the highlights:
1. Kevin drew an activities card which required us each to 'interpretive dance' to a song of the other persons choosing. Worst dance lost. Well, he had to dance to 'To the Dogs or Whoever' by Josh Ritter, and boy was it AWFUL. It mostly consisted of skipping and hiking up his boxers when the song go to the line 'did I mention how I love you in your underwear?'
2. Quickfire challenges were awesome. The first one had syrup, vanilla ice cream, chocolate chips, cinnamon wheat thins, and caramel sauce with a 4 minute time limit. I made a take on fried ice cream while Kevin made smiley face with ice cream sandwich eyes and a syrup mouth--and he won! The second challenge had spinach, salsa verde, garlic powder, mrs. dash, and limeade with a 5 minute time limit. I made a breakfast burrito with scrambled eggs and a sour cream/limeade/salsa verde sauce. Kevin made "HOT Cows in a Blanket"-- cottage cheese rolled up in spinach with salsa and a limeade vodka shot. Except he nuked cottage cheese for 20 seconds. Apparently it never occurred to him that it would melt.... here is what was left:
Needless to say, I won that round. And the game.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Goldfish are all they're cracked up to be
So, for those who haven't been paying attention to Goldfish crackers, watch out, because your mind is about to be blown!
Sorry, I've gotten too far ahead of myself. Goldfish crackers, those delightful bits of orange have recently experienced a resurgence on their awesomeness scale. That's right, they've elevated from "Way Awesome" to "Totally Awesome." How did PF (Pepperidge Farm) enhance the product formerly known as "That Thing That Plenty Of Kids Place In The Aquarium Whilst Their Dad Was Trying To Clean Said Aquarium Resulting In The Untimely Death Of Actual Living GoldFish" well, that's the mindblowing part.
... chocolate covered goldfish. Sit down, it'll be all right. Let me explain. The other day at work, someone came in asking for the chocolate goldfish. We assumed she was referring to the chocolate graham ones that even the most pedestrian of goldfishers knows about. But oh no, she actually wanted Goldfish crackers covered with chocolate, and the good people at Pepperidge Farm actually indulged this whim!
Granted, it's chocolate covered pretzels (AKA "The Poor Man's Poison"), but it's a step in the right direction. Imagine the funtastical directions the good people at PF could take this. Chocolate Covered Pizza. Chocolate Covered Nothin' But Nacho. Chocolate Covered Parmesean. Chocolate Covered Monterey Jack Sampler. Chocolate Covered Calcium Enriched Salt & Vinegar Goldfish Product (available in certain regions of Canada... screw you Montpelier!)--a name like that just rolls off the tongue... and down the throat! And my favorite, chocolate covered chocolate covered goldfish, with super enhanced sucky pretzel fighting endorphins.All I can say
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
House anyone?
Question: Does anyone who reads our blog watch House?
If so, I will definitely put up my thoughts that I've been reserving for my LiveJournal here.
If you don't watch House, give it a try--you won't be disappointed.
If so, I will definitely put up my thoughts that I've been reserving for my LiveJournal here.
If you don't watch House, give it a try--you won't be disappointed.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
random list of songs
Just randomly posting some sad/happy/bittersweet songs. Anybody have any good ones?
more than anyone - gavin degraw
delilah - plain white tees
book of love - peter gabriel
when the stars go blue - bono and the corrs (yes, i know ryan adams sings it)
green eyes - coldplay
scientist - coldplay
leather and lace - stevie nicks and don henley
love will keep us alive - the eagles
walking after you - foo fighters
iris - goo goo dolls
moon river - henry mancini
the city - joe purdy
have a little faith in me - john hiatt
i hear the bells - mike doughty
wonderwall - oasis
in your eyes - peter gabriel
hallelujah - rufus wainwright
never say blue like that - shawn colvin
wand - stuart davis
all i want is you - u2
friday i'm in love - the cure
just like heaven - the cure
every breath you take - the police
such great heights - postal service
to the dogs or whoever - josh ritter
temptation of adam - josh ritter
all i know - art garfunkel
and so it goes - billy joel
lover's will - bonnie raitt
i will always love you - dolly parton/whitney houston
end of innocence - don henley
sorry seems to be the hardest word - elton john
blue eyes blue - eric clapton
you look wonderful tonight - eric clapton
somewhere only we know - keane
true love waits - radiohead
chasing cars - snow patrol
love will come through - travis
into the west - annie lennox
pictures of you - the cure
my immortal - evanescence
cut here - the cure
beautiful child - stevie nicks
wake me up when september ends - green day
total eclipse of the heart - stevie nicks
if you ever did believe -stevie nicks
black balloon - goo goo dolls
good man - josh ritter
empty hearts - josh ritter
right moves - josh ritter
it never entered my mind - miles davis
wolves - josh ritter
Yeah, that really served no purpose.
more than anyone - gavin degraw
delilah - plain white tees
book of love - peter gabriel
when the stars go blue - bono and the corrs (yes, i know ryan adams sings it)
green eyes - coldplay
scientist - coldplay
leather and lace - stevie nicks and don henley
love will keep us alive - the eagles
walking after you - foo fighters
iris - goo goo dolls
moon river - henry mancini
the city - joe purdy
have a little faith in me - john hiatt
i hear the bells - mike doughty
wonderwall - oasis
in your eyes - peter gabriel
hallelujah - rufus wainwright
never say blue like that - shawn colvin
wand - stuart davis
all i want is you - u2
friday i'm in love - the cure
just like heaven - the cure
every breath you take - the police
such great heights - postal service
to the dogs or whoever - josh ritter
temptation of adam - josh ritter
all i know - art garfunkel
and so it goes - billy joel
lover's will - bonnie raitt
i will always love you - dolly parton/whitney houston
end of innocence - don henley
sorry seems to be the hardest word - elton john
blue eyes blue - eric clapton
you look wonderful tonight - eric clapton
somewhere only we know - keane
true love waits - radiohead
chasing cars - snow patrol
love will come through - travis
into the west - annie lennox
pictures of you - the cure
my immortal - evanescence
cut here - the cure
beautiful child - stevie nicks
wake me up when september ends - green day
total eclipse of the heart - stevie nicks
if you ever did believe -stevie nicks
black balloon - goo goo dolls
good man - josh ritter
empty hearts - josh ritter
right moves - josh ritter
it never entered my mind - miles davis
wolves - josh ritter
Yeah, that really served no purpose.
Monday, November 3, 2008
A million strong for lack of grocery fraud
We were just at the grocery store, and while there, Raina decided it was her mission to put Half and Half in someone's cart that wasn't buying Half and Half. Well, she definitely succeeded in this mission.
However, if you ask her, she claims she didn't intend to do this, and also everyone does this 24/7, even when they're not grocery shopping. To prove her wrong, I gathered some data and constructed the following pie chart in MS Paint.
If anyone else has never accidentally placed a grocery item in the wrong cart, feel free to comment to prove that nobody does this.
Thanks!
However, if you ask her, she claims she didn't intend to do this, and also everyone does this 24/7, even when they're not grocery shopping. To prove her wrong, I gathered some data and constructed the following pie chart in MS Paint.
If anyone else has never accidentally placed a grocery item in the wrong cart, feel free to comment to prove that nobody does this.
Thanks!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Beware, there's a haunted ass kicking
Raina and I have been going to a lot of haunted houses recently. Three in fact. We're not doing this because we know someone in the house or we're preteens looking for a good scare, we're doing it as a full-on research endeavor, because we are gonna open our own haunted house!
Since there's only a couple weeks until actual Halloween takes place, I'm gonna just lay out some of the ideas I've cribbed from our haunting experiences to showcase to you “Raina and Kevin's Most Ass Kickingest Haunted Scarefest Eva!©”
Here are some of the rooms I envision us having:
*Clown Autopsy room
What's the scariest thing about clowns? It's not the makeup, nor is it their photographic memories, it's how they murder people. That's where the clown autopsy room comes into play. Just picture it, a clown strung out on a table. Another clown with a scoopula full of clown brain forcing you to gaze into the sheer terror of clown bits. Also, on the way out, they'll stab you in the crotch. If that's not scary, you're either inhuman or... A CLOWN!!!! Oh wait, they're the same thing.
*Room where annoying little girls sing Katy Perry's “Hot N Cold” non-stop until you fashion a homemade shiv out of a credit card and stab yourself in the brain to death.
This is based on the experience we had at the Tulalip haunted house last night. While technically it took place outside of the house, I'm certain the evil haunted house purveyors stuck this sin against nature behind us just to add to the sheer terror of the evening. It didn't help that they kept nudging us as well.
*Strobe light room
You're legally required to have an incessant amount of strobe lights if you run a haunted house. We're just living up to union regulations with this one.
* Kitty petting room
I figure since our kitties will want to be involved, we'll let people pet them. But did I mention these kitties were PURE EVIL!?!?!!?!?!? I didn't, oh wait, they're not, but people do like cats, and you gotta play to the audience.
*Pile o' Credit Carded People
You gotta dispose of the corpses somehow, why not get a free cheap scare out of it.
*Chainsaw Murderer
Every single haunted house ever created always ends with a guy revving a chainsaw and chasing after people who foolishly forgot to wear their Kevlar. What'll make our experience different is we'll recruit heavily from a pool of convicted murderers, vampire slayers, jaywalkers and warlocks and let them go to town with the chainsaw. It's basically win-win, we get a really cool scare section (watching people murdered with a chainsaw is not appealing), and he or she gets to kill people. We probably don't even have to pay him or her!
*Erik Estrada explains Super String Theory
This is what we in the biz call a "double whammy"--celebrity nobody cares about explaining theory nobody understands. Inspired by us seeing Michael Ray Bower (Donkeylips from "Salute Your Shorts") explain the benefits of Grand Unification Theory at one of the haunted houses.
*Room playing 1990's classic horror film “It.”
At the haunted wood in Renton, we walked into a room playing this movie and Raina screamed her head off. There were no actors jumping out at us, it was just Tim Curry on DVD.
With all this killing that occurs, it might seem like we'd be liable for many of the deaths that occur in our establishment of fun. To get around that slight legal issue, all we'd need to do is make them sign a release form. These forms, like field trip permission forms of old will completely absolve us of any legal ramifications. They'll work, because even if people read them (doubtful), they'll assume when we say “I will not hold Raina and Kevin's Most Ass Kickingest Haunted Scarefest Eva!© responsible if a deranged clown murderer preteen drinks 14 feet of my long intestine,” they'll think we're just being facetious and having a grand ole time. We're not.
Since there's only a couple weeks until actual Halloween takes place, I'm gonna just lay out some of the ideas I've cribbed from our haunting experiences to showcase to you “Raina and Kevin's Most Ass Kickingest Haunted Scarefest Eva!©”
Here are some of the rooms I envision us having:
*Clown Autopsy room
What's the scariest thing about clowns? It's not the makeup, nor is it their photographic memories, it's how they murder people. That's where the clown autopsy room comes into play. Just picture it, a clown strung out on a table. Another clown with a scoopula full of clown brain forcing you to gaze into the sheer terror of clown bits. Also, on the way out, they'll stab you in the crotch. If that's not scary, you're either inhuman or... A CLOWN!!!! Oh wait, they're the same thing.*Room where annoying little girls sing Katy Perry's “Hot N Cold” non-stop until you fashion a homemade shiv out of a credit card and stab yourself in the brain to death.
This is based on the experience we had at the Tulalip haunted house last night. While technically it took place outside of the house, I'm certain the evil haunted house purveyors stuck this sin against nature behind us just to add to the sheer terror of the evening. It didn't help that they kept nudging us as well.
*Strobe light room
You're legally required to have an incessant amount of strobe lights if you run a haunted house. We're just living up to union regulations with this one.
* Kitty petting room
I figure since our kitties will want to be involved, we'll let people pet them. But did I mention these kitties were PURE EVIL!?!?!!?!?!? I didn't, oh wait, they're not, but people do like cats, and you gotta play to the audience.
*Pile o' Credit Carded People
You gotta dispose of the corpses somehow, why not get a free cheap scare out of it.
*Chainsaw Murderer
Every single haunted house ever created always ends with a guy revving a chainsaw and chasing after people who foolishly forgot to wear their Kevlar. What'll make our experience different is we'll recruit heavily from a pool of convicted murderers, vampire slayers, jaywalkers and warlocks and let them go to town with the chainsaw. It's basically win-win, we get a really cool scare section (watching people murdered with a chainsaw is not appealing), and he or she gets to kill people. We probably don't even have to pay him or her!*Erik Estrada explains Super String Theory
This is what we in the biz call a "double whammy"--celebrity nobody cares about explaining theory nobody understands. Inspired by us seeing Michael Ray Bower (Donkeylips from "Salute Your Shorts") explain the benefits of Grand Unification Theory at one of the haunted houses.
*Room playing 1990's classic horror film “It.”
At the haunted wood in Renton, we walked into a room playing this movie and Raina screamed her head off. There were no actors jumping out at us, it was just Tim Curry on DVD.
With all this killing that occurs, it might seem like we'd be liable for many of the deaths that occur in our establishment of fun. To get around that slight legal issue, all we'd need to do is make them sign a release form. These forms, like field trip permission forms of old will completely absolve us of any legal ramifications. They'll work, because even if people read them (doubtful), they'll assume when we say “I will not hold Raina and Kevin's Most Ass Kickingest Haunted Scarefest Eva!© responsible if a deranged clown murderer preteen drinks 14 feet of my long intestine,” they'll think we're just being facetious and having a grand ole time. We're not.
I can imagine one day Roger Ebert saying "Raina and Kevin's Most Ass Kickingest Haunted Scarefest Eva!© makes the Goosebumps tale 'Say Cheese and Die - Again!" seem like the Goosebumps tale 'My Best Friend is Invisible,' and you can quote me on that!" title>
So if any anyone is looking for an Ass Kicking good time, I know an Ass Kicking good place to do it at, that's right, Raina and Kevin's Most Ass Kickingest Haunted Scarefest Eva!©.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
cuteness.
Sprocket with a $5 bill... I haven't the faintest idea where he got it from. I let him keep playing with it for a little bit.
Our briefly adopted son. He is missed.
Snoozing with his fangs out.
The little miss Rio looks a little depressed about living in a hotel.
My bird boys being so cool. I heart them. Yoshi is the one with the red/peach face. Beaker is the one with the black mask.
Cleaner Cleaners! Mundane… I know.
Many of us clean our houses…. many not all. To most, a clean house equates to a healthier state of living. Fewer bacteria. Less dirt. Less grime. Less bubonic plague. Without cleaning, we’d be wallowing in our filth (and cat fur-- if you are like me) day in and day out. Ironic that the products we use to be healthier are actually incredibly hazardous, and they have to be to demolish all the E. coli and Streptococcus out there… or do they?
The quest for cleaner cleaners started when I regained ownership of my pair of lovebirds. Birds are very sensitive to odors, chemicals, and due to their low body weights and high metabolic rates. Canary in the coal mine anyone? For example, overheated Teflon© produces an odor which kills birds instantly. Leads me to wonder what it has done to me after repeatedly cooking my dinner in it and eating said dinner for over 10 years.
Wanting my feathered friends to live a long and healthy life, I decided to make the switch to natural cleaners. Being a recent college graduate with $18,345.39 of debt who moved to Seattle, WA on a whim without a job, the cost of my new cleaners was of some concern. Yes, a bottle of natural glass cleaner or soap only costs, on average, 50 cents to two dollars more than their conventional counterparts, but I’d rather spend that money on something a little less mundane than cleaning supplies.
It would have been very easy to slip into my old ways and opt for the cheaper variety, but as anyone who has purchased Malt-o-Meal Marshmallow Mateys instead of General Mills Lucky Charms knows, you get what you pay for –a toxic bowl full of pirates instead of the healthy, magically delicious clovers and blue moons. But, I was able to find a cost effective solution. Instead of paying the extra amount, I simply made my own using household ingredients—lemon juice, baking soda, grapefruit seed extract, olive oil, white vinegar, salt, liquid soap, and water. This allowed me to save money because these homemade cleaners cost even less than the generic variety and save my health and that of my birds.
Window cleaners, such as Windex, are either completely obsolete or easily replaceable, depending on which path you wish to take. Investment in microfiber cloths allows you to clean your windows with a little spritz of water and nothing more. Or you could make a solution using I cup vinegar to 1 gallon water. Many of you may cringe at the thought of spraying vinegar about your house because who wants to smell THAT?! I assure you, the odor goes away once it is dry. Add a little lemon juice to the mix to cut the smell. Would you rather choke down the fumes of a suspiciously blue-colored liquid with ingredients like ethylene glycol n-hexyl ether? Certainly not.
The Fantastik© risk of skin and eye irritation is completely eliminated by the use of Grapefruit Seed Extract. Simply mix 20 drops to one gallon of water and you have an all-purpose disinfectant. You can also use it as a fruit and veggie wash to remove pesticides.
Even air fresheners are dangerous—maybe not as dangerous as the odor from your warm smelly, but still. They (the air fresheners, not your toots—those are mostly methane) contain aromatic rings which smell wonderful but are known carcinogens. If you find yourself needing to mask the scent of a dead body or other yuckies, boil some water with cloves, cinnamon, orange peel, and/or ginger. Or just use some baking soda.
With these few items, I am able to clean my entire apartment—windows, tables, floors, carpets… everything. There is something to be said when I could literally open up any one of my cleaning bottles and take a drink without any serious harm coming to me – except for a repulsive taste. Would you dare to drink Windex, Fantastik, or any other commercial cleaner? I would guess not.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Dat Dern Rocks!
So, has anyone ever heard of this "Dance Dance Revolution" game? It's some new game from like Iceland or Captain Planet-ville or something. Imagine Guitar Hero, except instead of being in your hands in a guitar shaped form, it's on the ground, sort of like a dance pad, but WAY more technologically advanced.
If you've ever wanted to dance to Chris Brown, but don't believe you can actually "Run It," then this is the video game playing device for you!
Even if you suck at DDR like I do, you might not be too awful at Dance Dance Revolution. However, since I suck at Dance Dance Revolution, I'm not the greatest at DDR. It's like when a bee who has spent his entire life learning how to make honey all of the sudden being told to make something that's not honey. This is profound. Contemplate it.
I imagine we'll soon have pictures of me busting a move wiki-wiki style, so watch out, because this brand new game is off the hizzook!
If you've ever wanted to dance to Chris Brown, but don't believe you can actually "Run It," then this is the video game playing device for you!
Even if you suck at DDR like I do, you might not be too awful at Dance Dance Revolution. However, since I suck at Dance Dance Revolution, I'm not the greatest at DDR. It's like when a bee who has spent his entire life learning how to make honey all of the sudden being told to make something that's not honey. This is profound. Contemplate it.
I imagine we'll soon have pictures of me busting a move wiki-wiki style, so watch out, because this brand new game is off the hizzook!
Sunday, October 19, 2008
This is where pies come to die.
The other day we were sitting around, and I couldn't help but comment "Raina, do you realize we haven't done any of the Seattley-touristy things that people would have done circa-1990!?!?" To which Raina replied "No!?!?!?"
To amend that problem, we could have done two things... formed an angsty grunge band with naked children orrrrr gone to see the waterfall featured in the middle 17 seconds of the opening of the sometimes good, often bad, but always weird "Twin Peaks."
You can probably guess it, but we went with the latter... unless there's some sort of "Magic Eye" naked children collage hidden somewhere in the above waterfall picture.
The whole drive to Snoqualmie Falls, I kept wanting to quote Kyle MacLachlan in his role as Dale Cooper, but I realized the only quotes I could remember involved midget talking backwards but played forwards, which I'm too tall to do, so we mainly just looked at pretty pretty trees. Also car accidents a-plenty.
Snoqualmie Falls was pretty majestic. Here, let me paint a word picture for you before showing you another picture-picture. Imagine a lot of water (like larger than a whole pot of water) falling. And that's what it's like. Except there's a lot of it (see above note about it being more than a whole pot of water).
Watch the water falling!
Here are a couple more pictures from the journey for your viewing enjoyment.
Walking down to the bottom of the falls. If only I had remembered to bring my oversized novelty barrel, the journey time and Raina's torso would have been cut in half!
It was a really long walk.
More spelunking.
Like the original Bonnie and Clyde, we broke the law and sneaked down to the bottom of the waterfall. However, unlike them, what we did wasn't actually illegal.
Raina at the bottom. She told me not to get the tree in the shot, but guess what, I did (shhhhhh, don't tell her!)
As you might have heard, walking down to the bottom of the waterfall was kind of tiring, so I took a drink from it.
Note to future self: drinking an entire waterfall causes big time gut rot.
And back at the top... Raina really likes powerlines, whereas I like the power they bring. Kismet.We did plan to go and get pie from the diner featured in Twin Peaks, but we A. Didn't remember the name of it in the show, B. Didn't remember the name of it in real life. Maybe that can be a journey for another day, after all, there's always time for early '90s Seattley-Touristy time!
Until then!
Until then!
Friday, October 17, 2008
carkeek park
Took a little trip to Carkeek Park which is about two miles from our apartment. It was a nice little park that seems to be pretty "unknown" as compared to Discovery Park. There are wooded trails, grassy lawns, playgrounds, and some beach front. Photographic commentary to follow:
Kevin is hardcore.
Eating flowers. This was our break from frisbee because I am way out of shape and can't play for long periods of time without becoming winded.
Laying in the grass/clover.
More laying in the grass.
Kevin says this is what he was thinking while posing "she loves me :) [computer smiley]. she loves me not :( [computer unsmiley]."
Kevin's fist and he is eating the flower?
To document our day at the park.
On the beach...
The creek that has salmon in it. It winds all the way into the ocean.
Train tracks and fall colors!
Kevin brooding.
And that is all. Really exciting stuff, I know!
--R.
Kevin is hardcore.
Eating flowers. This was our break from frisbee because I am way out of shape and can't play for long periods of time without becoming winded.
Laying in the grass/clover.
More laying in the grass.
Kevin says this is what he was thinking while posing "she loves me :) [computer smiley]. she loves me not :( [computer unsmiley]."
Kevin's fist and he is eating the flower?
To document our day at the park.
On the beach...
The creek that has salmon in it. It winds all the way into the ocean.
Train tracks and fall colors!
Kevin brooding.
And that is all. Really exciting stuff, I know!
--R.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
CoasterChallengeCasualty!
For those expecting to get an update in the inaugural CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8, I have one... but it's not what you expected. There have been some casualties--or CoasterChallengeCasualties as I'm cleverly callin em (Another CCC!)
Basically, it boils down to this. In the grand confrontation between coasters and cats, cats will always win out.
Both Mr. Sprocket and Ms. Rio decided to go to town on either mine or Raina's coasters (Ha! You thought I was gonna skew the challenge!). We woke up one morning and Sprocket had little bits of Bear sticking out of his mouth. We tried resuscitating, but alas, it was not to be.
He lived his life like a candle in the wind.
Then a couple days later, Rio decided she hated the negative connotations associated with "Cat's Game" and went to town on the Tic-Tac-Toe Coaster.
Talk about the ultimate end game.
As you can see in the above pics, she didn't just play with it, she tore the whole thing apart, like it was her job to ensure we didn't have anything to put our condensating beverages upon.
But here's the thing, Rio, we do!
With that said, CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8 is still raging strong. Sure, we're down two, but they're still in contention. If anyone wants to participate, feel free, because it's still on!
Basically, it boils down to this. In the grand confrontation between coasters and cats, cats will always win out.
Both Mr. Sprocket and Ms. Rio decided to go to town on either mine or Raina's coasters (Ha! You thought I was gonna skew the challenge!). We woke up one morning and Sprocket had little bits of Bear sticking out of his mouth. We tried resuscitating, but alas, it was not to be.
He lived his life like a candle in the wind.Then a couple days later, Rio decided she hated the negative connotations associated with "Cat's Game" and went to town on the Tic-Tac-Toe Coaster.
Talk about the ultimate end game.
As you can see in the above pics, she didn't just play with it, she tore the whole thing apart, like it was her job to ensure we didn't have anything to put our condensating beverages upon.
But here's the thing, Rio, we do!
With that said, CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8 is still raging strong. Sure, we're down two, but they're still in contention. If anyone wants to participate, feel free, because it's still on!
PAWS interview
Hello all,
I had my working interview at PAWS Wildlife Center in Lynnwood, WA today. I think it went ok, their center is so much more advanced than Four Lakes, but I think I could learn it pretty quickly. They didn't really have many patients at the time, so it was pretty mellow.
First, I just walked around with the rehabbers and watched them do what they do. Sat in on the rounds meeting with the vet and assistant. Highlights of the day are:
1. Bobcat - I got to touch and feed a young bobcat. Pretty sweet. She was cute, but sick :(
2. Harbor Seal - I got to see it. Pretty stubborn apparently and won't eat so it may be transferred.
3. Bears - I got to see them. They were only on a camera though.
4. Deer - I fed them. Odd since we can't do those in Wisconsin.
Then, I was sent off to talk to all of the people who work there for a couple minutes at a time. I think this was probably the part of the day that went the best. This is suprising considering I am not very social.
She said they would get back to me but it may take ahwile. I have no idea how many people I am up against, but I hope I get it. It would be pretty amazing. I do know I am facing someone who has 5 years experience and a vet tech for sure... which intimidates me a bit.
I don't really have much else to say about it. Keep your fingers crossed.
--R.
I had my working interview at PAWS Wildlife Center in Lynnwood, WA today. I think it went ok, their center is so much more advanced than Four Lakes, but I think I could learn it pretty quickly. They didn't really have many patients at the time, so it was pretty mellow.
First, I just walked around with the rehabbers and watched them do what they do. Sat in on the rounds meeting with the vet and assistant. Highlights of the day are:
1. Bobcat - I got to touch and feed a young bobcat. Pretty sweet. She was cute, but sick :(
2. Harbor Seal - I got to see it. Pretty stubborn apparently and won't eat so it may be transferred.
3. Bears - I got to see them. They were only on a camera though.
4. Deer - I fed them. Odd since we can't do those in Wisconsin.
Then, I was sent off to talk to all of the people who work there for a couple minutes at a time. I think this was probably the part of the day that went the best. This is suprising considering I am not very social.
She said they would get back to me but it may take ahwile. I have no idea how many people I am up against, but I hope I get it. It would be pretty amazing. I do know I am facing someone who has 5 years experience and a vet tech for sure... which intimidates me a bit.
I don't really have much else to say about it. Keep your fingers crossed.
--R.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
coolest.thing.ever.
We took our kitties to get their shots today. Sprocket got his ego stroked so badly by the vet, according to her Rocket was "muscular, handsome, beautiful hair, teeth, and tail, etc." He liked that, until she stabbed him with a thermometer in the butt and rabies shots in his skin--then he hissed and was completely fowl. Rio was her usually petrified self.
ANYWAY, coolest thing ever happened when we roll up to our parking space.
K: What kind of bird is THAT?!
R: What bird?
K: Right there.... *points out window*
R: OH MY GOD! That's a hawk... with a pigeon! WHY DON'T I HAVE MY CAMERA!?!?!
It was a hawk (cooper's? I'm so sad I'm not from here. I don't even know the native hawks! I miss knowing most of the bird friends!) eating his newly caught pigeon right infront of our door. I mean, he was like... 2 feet away from us.... just chowing down.
I realize I shouldn't be this excited given I've held and fed a bunch of hawks on a regular basis... but it is so much better in nature! This makes me want to go birding more--put my $350 binoculars to good use.
So the pictures I did get:
To illustrate proximity. Kevin's car is the silver one in the center of the picture. The white things are feathers from the pigeon.
Close up of the feathers and the little bit of flesh.
The culprit high in the tree nearby. He flew off (with the pigeon) once I opened my door and got out.
Here he is again. Looking at me.
And again, he had dropped the pigeon on the ground by this point.
Thinking about going down to pick it up.
There is the half-eaten pigeon.
So. Cool.
--R.
ANYWAY, coolest thing ever happened when we roll up to our parking space.
K: What kind of bird is THAT?!
R: What bird?
K: Right there.... *points out window*
R: OH MY GOD! That's a hawk... with a pigeon! WHY DON'T I HAVE MY CAMERA!?!?!
It was a hawk (cooper's? I'm so sad I'm not from here. I don't even know the native hawks! I miss knowing most of the bird friends!) eating his newly caught pigeon right infront of our door. I mean, he was like... 2 feet away from us.... just chowing down.
I realize I shouldn't be this excited given I've held and fed a bunch of hawks on a regular basis... but it is so much better in nature! This makes me want to go birding more--put my $350 binoculars to good use.
So the pictures I did get:
To illustrate proximity. Kevin's car is the silver one in the center of the picture. The white things are feathers from the pigeon.
Close up of the feathers and the little bit of flesh.
The culprit high in the tree nearby. He flew off (with the pigeon) once I opened my door and got out.
Here he is again. Looking at me.
And again, he had dropped the pigeon on the ground by this point.
Thinking about going down to pick it up.
There is the half-eaten pigeon.
So. Cool.
--R.
Friday, October 10, 2008
CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8
Kevin here, introducing you to what just might change your life. CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8. Now, what exactly does this entail? I'm guessing most of my audience knows what a coaster is (WHEEEE!) and several know what a challenge is, thanks to Food Network Challenge, but what exactly is a CoasterChallenge, especially in 2000 ought 8?
Well, Raina and I spent the past several nights hatching a plan for the greatest CoasterPlanOff in the history of this world. With our bare hands, we constructed coasters to use in our apartment. Here's where the challenge comes in... Kevin made four of the following coasters, while Raina constructed an also spectacular five coasters.
Which one made which? Who will know? Can you guess it? Can you dig it? Find out in CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8!
Here's how it works, I'm going to list all nine of the coasters with vague descriptors, and our vast audience of 3 people will then (hopefully) guess which one of us made which coaster.
1. Bear
2. Tic-Tac-Toe
3. XFL Football
4. "Hay Boy"
5. My Loves
6. Antidisestablishmentarianism
7. Striped
8. Owl
9. Initials
Please reply with 1-9 with the names of who you think did what next to it. Whoever guesses the most right wins a gigantic prize. We will congratulate you, and it might even be publicly. However, we shall not give you a coaster, because we need those to rest our drinks upon. Sorry.
Here's a couple hints... someone's parent played an XTREME form of football, and another tends to either like or dislike the established ruling class of any land.
If you also want to say which one is your favorite, feel free to note that as well, by placing next to the number "FAVORITE." Although for the purpose of this CoasterChallenge and this CoasterChallenge only, the phrase "Kevin" can be assumed to mean "OH MY GOD, THIS IS LIKE THE BESTEST THING EVERRRRR."
And look forward to CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 9, which will feature among other things coasters encompassing The Magna Carta, Degrassi High, Glow Worms, Captain Planet, Jodie Foster, Peanuts (not the comic), Corn, Angels of Death, Destruction and Torture, Sake, Janice Dickinson and a whole slew more!
Respond early, respond often, because CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8 is ON!!!!!!
Well, Raina and I spent the past several nights hatching a plan for the greatest CoasterPlanOff in the history of this world. With our bare hands, we constructed coasters to use in our apartment. Here's where the challenge comes in... Kevin made four of the following coasters, while Raina constructed an also spectacular five coasters.
Which one made which? Who will know? Can you guess it? Can you dig it? Find out in CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8!
Here's how it works, I'm going to list all nine of the coasters with vague descriptors, and our vast audience of 3 people will then (hopefully) guess which one of us made which coaster.
1. Bear
2. Tic-Tac-Toe
3. XFL Football
4. "Hay Boy"
5. My Loves
6. Antidisestablishmentarianism
7. Striped
8. Owl
9. Initials
Please reply with 1-9 with the names of who you think did what next to it. Whoever guesses the most right wins a gigantic prize. We will congratulate you, and it might even be publicly. However, we shall not give you a coaster, because we need those to rest our drinks upon. Sorry.
Here's a couple hints... someone's parent played an XTREME form of football, and another tends to either like or dislike the established ruling class of any land.
If you also want to say which one is your favorite, feel free to note that as well, by placing next to the number "FAVORITE." Although for the purpose of this CoasterChallenge and this CoasterChallenge only, the phrase "Kevin" can be assumed to mean "OH MY GOD, THIS IS LIKE THE BESTEST THING EVERRRRR."
And look forward to CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 9, which will feature among other things coasters encompassing The Magna Carta, Degrassi High, Glow Worms, Captain Planet, Jodie Foster, Peanuts (not the comic), Corn, Angels of Death, Destruction and Torture, Sake, Janice Dickinson and a whole slew more!
Respond early, respond often, because CoasterChallenge 2000 ought 8 is ON!!!!!!
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